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Monday, 5 March 2018

I'm sick of feminism.


I'm sick of feminism. I sick of those that are pro-feminism and those that are anti-feminism. I'm sick of hearing that 'feminism is about gender equality' and equally that 'feminism is cancer.' I'm sick of every female-oriented story or film or show being classed as 'feminist.' I'm sick of seeing it and hearing it all over the media. I'm sick of 'girl power' and International Women's Day.

If you've read any of my posts on feminism, you'll know that my views are as follows: I stopped calling myself a feminist two years ago because I dislike the negative elements of the third wave feminist movement. I feel that it was once a positive thing about women's rights and is now filled with women demanding special privileges. Mostly, I don't feel that there's a right that men have that women (in the West/first world countries) don't have. I live in Britain and I have never once in my life felt that I have been treated poorly or not been allowed to do something because I'm a woman.

I'm so fed up of everything always being about feminism nowadays. I'm a huge fan of Game of Thrones, and I do like that it has a prominent balance of female and male characters. However, I don't see why that has to make it 'feminist.' I don't see why Sex and the City or Orange is the new black are 'feminist' because they are shows with mainly female characters. I feel that is counter-productive; you wouldn't call Oz or The Sopranos 'meninist' because they are about men's tales, so why do female tales have to have some 'extra' word added to them? Why can't they just be a story?

In the world we live in today, lots of positive changes have come about and things are looking good for women in a lot of ways. Feminism has positively contributed to this through things like contraceptive rights, equal pay, sexual freedom and of course the vote. I am someone who has always been career-driven, and I would hate to live in a country where my main 'aspiration' in life would have to be looking for a husband and child. I don't think being a housewife is a bad thing if it makes you happy, and I do feel that the feminist movement has now pushed having a career as more important than motherhood, as opposed to saying individual women should do what makes them happy. I know I would never ever feel fulfilled by being some man's little doll wife to cook him meals and watch TV all day, it would kill me inside.

But the point is, no woman living in Europe, North America, Canada or Oceania nowadays is generally pushed to fill that specific gender role. I don't know why so many elements of modern-day feminism have become about finding problems that aren't there. I don't know why I 'have' to label myself a certain way. I used to subscribe to the notion that believing in gender equality means you're a feminist, but it doesn't really because feminism is about women's rights, not women's and men's rights. The modern day feminist movement doesn't even care about issues facing men, such as male suicide rates, men losing out in child custody cases, and men being given harsher prison sentences. Then there are smaller cases like men still being expected to pay for everything and do all of the work in a relationship to try to please a demanding woman who claims to be for equality but then walks all over her partner.

This is mainly a repeat/summary of my other posts on feminism, but it sparked up for two reasons. One is because I recently saw this stupid video in which a feminist interviewed by Carl Tucker said we should ban the word 'man.' I don't know much about Carl Tucker but I do know that Fox News is a right-wing tabloid platform and that it is likely that woman was picked to be on the show to make feminism deliberately look stupid. But what I find more infuriating is why I know about this and why it has to circulate the internet. Surely there are more important things? No one should care that some sexist bigot wants to get rid of the word 'man' because she hates men and thinks women should kill them all. It pains me that I have to write that very sentence (albeit sarcastically).

I'm just sick of seeing the same arguments for and against feminism crop up time and time again. And what is this 'feminism is cancer' business? It's all over the internet. Whether you agree with feminism or not, comparing it to a deadly disease is petty and far-fetched. I know most people say it jokingly or ironically but it's still a pain and just makes you sound like an immature idiot.

The second reason is because one of my favourite authors, Louise O'Neill, just released her third book which I bought the day it came out and yes have already finished it. She is a feminist, but I love her because I like her writing style and her content and she writes about important topics like body image, consent, assault, and her latest is all about infatuation/obsessive love. I have a lot of respect for her and plan to write a whole post tomorrow about her books. However, while reading her third book I kept noticing bits of 'feminism' flashing out, and at times it felt like too much. It didn't at all detract from how good and gripping the story was, but I do feel that with artists who are 'ideology driven', sometimes too much of that shows through the art so it becomes 'preachy.'

When it comes to art, I think the art should come first and the ideology should come around that, but it shouldn't overshadow it. Stephen King is a great one with this, even mentioning in in It through one of his characters. Yes, George R R Martin has strong female characters all over his story, but it doesn't overshadow the story. Daenerys and Arya and Catelyn and Brienne and Sansa are all solid women but their personalities and characters all come through first. Some view Daenerys as a 'feminist icon', and I think for fuck's sake give me a break. She's brilliant - I wrote a whole blog post about her - but let's look at her character, rather than bringing it all back to feminism. 

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